PSYCHO THE RAPIST!

This is neither any confession page of a rapist nor any victim's column, these are in fact my myopic eyes' dirty tricks on me.

#1

Once during a library hour in school I had my face buried in the latest copy of  The Hardy Boys. And in came my friend with a book in her hand. I was so irritated that I wanted to shoo her away and get back to my boys' adventures! I took a quick glimpse at the book in her hand and read,

"AREEESAYYY AWAAKAAYYY. "

"Now why did you grab a French book?? ", I added.

She was so startled to hear that from me, not only was she offended, but I even made her doubt her reading abilities.

Yes it was rude but more than that it wasn't any French book after all, it was written in plain English and the title read,

"ARISE AWAKE  - SWAMI VIVEKANANDA"



#2

Exactly two years after the mayhem of ARISAAYYY AWAAKKAYY my eyes managed to do it again.
It was my 11th grade year and I was reading a poem by Kamala Das, I even went on to read the 'About the Author' section to completely assimilate the contents, I paused at this particular section. thought for a while and read out loud," PAAADAMVETTYY THE HARLOT."

I heard peels of laughter in the classroom and then I heard this guy saying," Neetha, isn't that PADMAVATI THE HARLOT??"


#3

Chennai!!
As much as I hated the burning weather, I absolutely loved the south Indian dishes! I was walking around the streets with my dad and something caught my eyes, I stopped him suddenly and asked in a confused tone,"Appa what do they mean by that, PURELY BUTTERFLY MASALADOSA??!"

"I thought most of the Tamilians were vegans and not someone who would  feed on butterflies!!"

Even before I could talk any further my dad squeezed my arm, and demanded to put on my glasses.
And I read it again clearly," PURELY BUTTERLY MASALADOSA."



#4

Chennai again!

We were at a bus bay waiting, and I read this flex board about an apartment. Just like always I fell for my eyes' tricks again.

"FLATS WITH NO HIDDEN CAMERAS"

And I thought," Oh!! So all the other apartments had hidden cameras??!!"

This time I didn't read it out loud, in order to confirm what I just read in my head I had my glasses on and then read it out loud, " FLATS WITH NO HIDDEN CHARGES"



*************************************************************

And if you are still perplexed about the bizarre title of this post, simply concatenate the the words to get 'PSYCHOTHERAPIST'


Picture Source : Internet

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

This is my weight loss story and I won't recommend it

Image
I have never wanted to be a Health blogger, boasting about ways to go vegan, feed on green fluids which tastes like an exploded veggie dynamite in your mouth. But I have to do this, yes I used to be one of those females cutting off dairy, cutting off gluten, cutting off sugar and all the wonderful things from my life. Yes two months back I had the most paper thin body of all. And I did this all just to clear up my face. I went down to shocking 40kg! I was falling ill frequently. The worst part, I was still so stubborn with my diet, I was happy with the fact that my face was clearing and that's when I started forgetting about my health.  For my 25th birthday, it somehow struck me, that I had to stop this. I got so paper thin. It was then that I ended the months old diet. I started feeding on cheese, meat, sugar. Clearly for the first few weeks I could see all the side effects on my skin, I thought no to bother and kept going. The following week, I  finally felt flesh
Read more

The somebody's voice

Image
I am not a churchgoer and to be certifiably true to myself, it has been more than six months since I last attended a mass. Crowd intimidates me . I am the kind of person who goes to church as a loner. I like sitting there quietly to ruminate, to thank,  to implore, to pray and maybe just stay still in the tranquility. When my mother dragged me to church the other day, I was prepared to stay quiet. The liturgy began, followed by gospel reading and it was time for pastor to speak. I was listening diligently. And I was just so grateful for being there then, for I heard this humble gem of a story called, ROSES FOR MAMA. And now I am here writing about it, a small thought for our busy lives. * ROSES FOR MAMA * It was his mother's birthday, even in his busy schedules between work and marriage he always made sure to send roses for his mama on her special day.  During the lunch hour he went to the usual flower shop and ordered the most expensive bouquet of
Read more

Are you two together?

This is the most obvious question when a girl and a guy hangs out. But things got interesting when I went out with two of my guy friends. This happened back in 2016. We were at a restaurant at Niagara falls. There was this enthusiastic photographer going to every table taking complimentary pictures. He finally came to our table and offered to take a picture. We agreed. The three of us sat together. I was in the middle. Looking at me and the buddy to my left, the photographer asked, "Are you two together?" To this, 'the left side buddy' said, "Nooooooo!" The photographer did not give up. Looking at me and the buddy to my right side he asked,"Are you two together?" To this, 'the right side buddy' said, "Nooooooooooo!" The photographer just couldn't help the last question, he had to ask. Looking at both the guys he asked, "Are you two together?????" To this the three of us said in unison - &
Read more